How To Tell If Sirius Loves You
by Javien Deluke
Summary: A few drabbles about Remus and Sirius surrounding when they find out he's a werewolf. Rated T for a big safety-net.
1. Piece of Evidence 1

Chapter 1: "Somebody loves you if they pick an eyelash off of your face or wet a napkin and apply it to your dirty skin."

"So they carved the first president's face into Mount Rushmore... what are you doing?"Remus didn't care when Sirius had stared at him for longer than a comfortably slow glance, he could have been dozing off. He didn't care when Sirius had brought his thumb up to his lips, he could have been biting his nail. Remus cared when Sirius leaned over and scrubbed gently at his cheek bone with a spit-covered thumb. All thought of muggle studies flew out his left ear when Sirius didn't answer. He raised an eyebrow when Sirius pulled his hand back and then wiped it carelessly on his bed spread.

"Hmm? Oh, there was some dirt on your face. I got it for you." He grinned cheerfully at his tutor, unaware of how how uncomfortable he'd just made him.

"What?" Sirius frowned when Remus continued to stare, a little wide-eyed.

"Nothing," Remus said finally, clearing his throat. "That just seemed so... motherly, I guesss." There was a silence after he looked away. Sirius barked with laughter moments later, rolling onto his back on the bed they were studying on. Remus stayed where he was, cross legged at the foot of the bed, unsure of exactly how to respond to his hysterical friend.

"Remus!" He barked after a few minutes, "How in the world, no offense, could I be motherly? First of all, you know the situation with my family and secondly, I'm a MAN..." His cheeks flushed with embarrassment slightly as he grunted in response.

"Not a man yet. Alright then, if it wasn't motherly, what was it?" Sirius considered Remus for a moment, his eyes narrowed before chuckling again.

"Hell if I know, who's his face that was on Mount Rushy?"

"Mount RUSHMORE," Remus responded, flicking Sirius on the forehead as he settled on his elbows, closer to Remus than before.

(But only just.)


	2. Piece of Evidence 2

"Somebody loves you if they assume the role of caretaker when you're sick."

He burst through the doors of the bathroom and into a stall, dropping to his knees and gripping the sides of the toilet as his lunch came up through his throat. Remus coughed and gagged, breathing heavily for half a minute before puking again. He laughed and cursed his confused stomach for rumbling hungrily after throwing up everything he'd eaten for the second time that day. When he was sure there was nothing left to throw up, he wiped his mouth and flushed the toilet, sitting down against the side of the old stall and resting for a moment, waiting for his stomach to settle. It looked like food poisoning. It could be food poisoning, Remus told himself. He could convince his friends that he was the sick one this month. But it was just his luck that he would hear someone come into the bathroom while he was still sitting on the ground, stomach too nervous and legs too weak to stand up and brush off his robes or hell, make it look like he'd already caught his breath.

"Remus..." Sighed a pained voice. Remus dared to look up into Sirius's concerned face as he stood over him at the entrance of the stall. His eyes begged Sirius not to ask, not to make him lie when all he wanted to do was curl up on his bed and die. Sirius eyed Remus warily for a few more moments before stepping forward and setting down on one knee to feel his friend's forehead.

"Don... don't take me to the infirmary..." Remus begged him as Sirius's cool hand layed to rest on his overheated neck. He continued to take in Remus's sickly appearance before speaking.

"Hmm... I won't. Not this time, anyway. Can you walk? Come on, I'll help you to the domitory." Remus leaned his head back against the side of the stall and held up a finger, telling Sirius to give him a minute. After a while of this, Sirius finally decided that the smaller boy wasn't going to get up on his own. He cupped his arms in his hands -surprisingly thin- above the boy's elbows and pulled him up to his feet. The first thing Remus noticed when he was up to his normal height again was the horrid, stomach churning migraine that had somehow burrowed into his head like a worm. It felt like it was still burrowing. Remus staggered for a moment when Sirius let him go, then fell forward. "He-Remus! Whoa, Remus!" Sirius called out in surprise, catching his friend in a firm hug.

"I'm sorry, I can walk.." Remus mumbled, pushing weakly against Sirius's chest. Sirius ignored him, taking Remus's right arm and dropping it over his neck for support and wrapping an arm around his waist. They slowly made their way to the dormitory and were met half way by James and Peter. Remus could hear voices talking, but couldn't seem to recognize who it was that was saying each word. This was going to be a bad month.

"Sirius... Remus!" James yelled, rushing over to his friends. Peter trailed behind him, looking like a scared child. "What happened?" Sirius put a finger to his lips and stopped so they could talk. Remus closed his eyes and let his head hang. Sirius didn't know what had happened, but he tightened his hold on the boy in case he fainted.

"I don't know, he was like this when I found him in the bathroom... nasty sickness, whatever he's got," Sirius whispered gently, trying not to make too much noise. "Can you help me? Let's get him to the dormitory." So James grabbed Remus's other arm and slumped it over his shoulder and they all made their way to the Gryffindor dormitory. Peter walked a bit in front of them to ensure they'd get there without any trouble. Not that there'd be any trouble- it was in the middle of class time. Once they'd gotten him up the stairs and into his bed, Remus sort of went limp and muttered things about classes and notes and studying. Sirius, James, and Peter stood over him as he did this, eyes half closed and dazed for a while before Sirius finally stepped forward and put a hand over his mouth. "Listen to me, you are not going back to class today. James and Peter will take care of all of that, won't you guys? Then they'll get the notes you need from Evans or Longbottom, someone with brains, but you are not moving and I am staying here to make sure you don't." Remus relaxed when he heard about the notes and the classes. He didn't bother scolding Sirius for skipping his own classes, he knew he wouldn't get anywhere with it. Sirius finally took his hand off of his friend's mouth and straightened to look at James and Peter. They nodded agreement, they'd do it.

A few hours passed and Remus slept soundly throughout the remainder of the day. Sirius had kept his word and had pulled an arm chair up to the bed so he could be sure Remus never moved. It was almost dinner when Remus awoke from a blissful sleep. He sat bolt upright and Sirius dropped the book he'd been reading to the floor and stood to push Remus back down to his pillow.

"No getting up, I told you." He stared up at Sirius, frustrated. His throat hurt and he wanted a glass of water, but he was too stubborn to ask so he rolled over onto his side instead, willing away the migraine. It wasn't going to work, of course, but he was going to put up with it as long as possible.

A long, painful silence ensued.

"Would you like me to get you anything? How do you feel?" Sirius asked after a while, walking to the other side of the bed to put his hand on Remus's forehead again. It was hotter. He frowned. "No offense mate, but how do you sleep and get sicker?" Remus continued to glare at him.

"Could you please get me a cup of water?" Sirius grinned fondly down at him and ruffled his hair before rushing off to get Remus a cup of water. Remus stared at his hand next to him for a moment, then narrowed his eyes and reached it up to ruffle his hair the way Sirius had. Why didn't it feel as comforting?


	3. Piece of Evidence 3

Remus knew that his friends were getting annoyed with him. He was missing for three days every month, what kind of friends wouldn't be getting annoyed or at least a little curious at this point? He tried to come up with a variety of excuses every month, but his dear Aunt Sally and her health problems were becoming extremely old extremely quickly. The way James would stare at him lately, calculating; cold, scared him more than any of the transformations had. James knew- they all knew something wasn't quite right. It was their third year in Hogwarts and his friends were just about at the end of their patience. Either that or they'd figured out what was wrong with him. His blood ran cold at the thought and he turned away from James's face once again, shakily stacking his books and loading them into his bag. "Yes, James?" Remus asked, his tone hollow. "Something's up with you, Remus. Something's never been quite right." Remus paused for a moment, stiffened, then buckled his old frayed bag and tried to rush hurriedly past James, but James grabbed his shoulder. "Remus, you can tell us anything. We're you're bloody best friends. If you're in trouble or if you need help, you can ask us." Remus smiled at him and laughed, a little hysterically. "I'm fine, James, really. Worry about yourself sometimes, alright? I'd hate to find your body in a ditch somewhere because Lily finally got fed up with you." James tightened his hold and despite himself, Remus let out a low whine. James's hand was resting on one of the worst gashes from the last full moon. "This," he huffed impatiently, "is not a joke, Remus. You're in trouble. We can help. Why don't you let us help?" It was all Remus could do not to let his eyes water. He never cried. It was a reaction of the pressure James was applying to his injured shoulder. "Jame-" he grunted, shrugging his friend's hand off. But before he could deny anything else, James tugged the collar of his shirt down over his shoulder. He saw the bandage for a full three second before Remus could slap his hand away and rush off to his next class. James stood there in the empty Transfiguration classroom, staring after Remus with his fingers clenched into fists at his sides.

The next couple of classes went as normal, but Remus was still tense and paranoid because of James's confrontation. Little did he know that as he brooded in silence for most of the potions class, Lily had been watching him. She knew from James that something was up and this sudden, sullen, silence only proved their theory more plausible. Remus was in some kind of trouble and they'd be damned if they were going to let him suffer through it alone. Lily knew not to approach someone when they were angry like she knew not to touch something burning. So she left him a note on the inside of his Potions book when he wasn't looking at the end of class. On the way out she whispered, "have a nice day, Remus," into his ear as she brushed past and knocked his books out of his hands. He was startled at her carelessness for a moment, then sighed and dragged the pile of books off to the side so he could stuff the papers and books back into his bag. He should have known Lily had talked to James when he picked up the torn piece of parchment from his potions book, but it didn't help that everyone was trying to help him and he was deathly afraid of that and that alone. He felt like a child, ignoring everyone and shoving off his friends' help, causing everyone worry when being a werewolf was such a hideous and ridiculous thing to worry about. They didn't know, of course, but it still sent a chill down his spine every time James looked like he'd figured something out. Sirius had been distant this whole two and half months they'd been back in school. Remus hadn't exactly been looking for him, he just thought it was strange that one of his best friends was being distant. Peter always gave him a sad look and a reassuring pat on the back whenever he felt it was necessary: which, to be honest, it always was necessary and Remus often wondered if the smallest boy had more of an understanding than the rest of his friends. "  
>Peter would never accuse him of struggling alone or being foolish- in fact, he hardly said things at all concerning Remus's obvious plight. He was just there and he would smile and give him a pat on the back and that was more of a blessing than Remus could ask for. James, Lily, and Sirius on the other hand... they were the ones he had to worry about. Sirius hadn't approached him with it yet, but for some reason, that was the confrontation Remus was most afraid of. It wasn't that he knew him any more than the others, it was simply that he told Remus when he felt something was off. For example, he wouldn't say, "You look tired," but rather, "You're tired." And that would be that. So if he said, "You're in trouble, what happened?" How was Remus supposed to react? He couldn't tell him "Everything's fine. I've just got a little problem, you know, being a WEREWOLF every month." That would be absolutely ludicrous and thinking of something to say, despite Remus's gift for generally being the one who had a gift for thinking of things to say, was difficult to say the least. But as he brooded and wished for some more freedom from his friends' concern, he knew it in the pit of his stomach that there was a little voice in the back of his head that wished for something else. He knew he was going to have to tell them. He hoped they wouldn't try to kill him. He wished they could still be friends after he told them... but he wasn't sure just how tolerant they were willing to be. Dumbledore was the image of tolerance- the question was, were his friends? While he was thinking, he almost ran into a surprised and slightly exhausted-looking Sirius Black and stopped abruptly in front of him. Yet again, he dropped his books. Sirius raised an eyebrow and asked if he was alright before bending down to help Remus pick up his scattered books. When he got no reply, he asked again.<p>

"Remus. Are you alright? You look like a ghost..." Remus had to remind himself that he hadn't said, "Werewolf, you're a werewolf," and relaxed a bit.

"I'm fine, Sirius, thank you for helping me with my books." He offered Sirius the best smile he could manage, given that he was still off him Remus-land somewhere in his head. After he once again buckled the troublesome lock on his bag, he started to walk off. Sirius caught up with him anyway and tapped the back of his head to get his attention.

"I've known you for three years and I've never seen you look so upset. What's up?" Sirius had taken Remus's shoulders in his hands to stop him from walking away.

"M-my aunt is very..." He began, his stomach sinking. He didn't want to lie to sirius. He didn't want to give his aunt a bad reputation, either. "Stubborn in her choice of medicine." He finished blearily. Sirius frowned at him, seeing through it in an instant.

"Remus, you haven't even gotten any mail from your aunt. How am I supposed to believe that?"

"No! No, it's true, the last time I was there.. about a week ago... you know, she didn't let the doctors treat her with drugs. She was in so much pain and there was nothing she'd let me do to help." His voice quivered and broke as he lied. It was so obvious. Sirius wasn't sure whether to burst his bubble and tell him that the lying was getting ridiculous or go along with it. He could upset his friend if he actually had a sick aunt. He decided to chance it.

"Remus, I sent an owl to your parents at one point asking how your aunt was and how you were and they said that you hadn't been home. Now, are you going to tell me what's going on or should I ask them?" Remus's control broke and he immediately looked away, his eyes wide. He was also becoming vividly aware of just how much pressure Sirius was applying to his shoulders. Once again, he tried to shrug out of his friend's hold, but it backfired. Sirius probably thought he was going to run away and he grabbed his shoulders tighter. Remus, who hadn't exactly expected that, cried out and ducked out of Sirius's grasp as his face lit up with shock and he let go of Remus like a hot coal. His bag slipped off as he doubled over and he leaned against the wall, bent, clutching at the skin around his left shoulder. Sirius stood there for another moment in shock before his expression went stiff and he turned to remus, pulling his collar down enough to see the now bloodied bandage. Remus didn't even move- he didn't want to hurt it again. Sirius let go of his shirt and looked away, seemingly at nothing, and his hand dropped limply by his side. "Who?" He asked, not looking at Remus. Remus didn't answer. "Who?" He yelled, now facing his friend.

"I... can we talk about this... with Dumble.. dore...?" he asked, not really sure how to answer Sirius. Sirius nodded, but said they should drop by Madam Pomfrey's to get his shoulder checked out first.

Madam Pomfrey ended up worsening the situation. When he sat down and said he needed a new bandage for his shoulder, she asked if he needed some for the other wounds as well. To which, Sirius reacted rather strongly.

"THERE ARE OTHERS?" He yelled. Something fell over. Or maybe, he'd kicked it. Remus didn't say anything, just dipped his head and hugged his knees to his chest in an attempt to curl further in on himself. However, Madam Pomfrey was even angrier at his outburst. She pulled him into the hall and they argued. Remus, if possible, hugged his knees closer to his chest. She said something about his parents and that he had a lack of control and that he needed to pull it together and that reacting so strongly to a simple statement wasn't going to help Remus, or any of the other patients. (There were none.) Regardless, she made him stay outside of the hospital wing and when Madam Pomfrey walked back in, he could hear Sirius yelling at other students. They had probably attracted attention, yelling like that in a hallway. "What? What are you looking at?" He heard Sirius shout in anger. Remus wanted to go out and pull him into a hug or at least take him somewhere else. He recognized that boy. It wasn't angry Sirius. It was upset, hurt, and worried Sirius. Madam pomfrey stared at the door for a moment before looking down at Remus and realizing he had covered his ears. Her expression softened in sadness... the boy had mentioned his parents fought after he'd been bitten. Fairly frequently on a weekly basis. She walked around to the other side of the bed and knelt down, gently pulling his hands off the side of his head. She coudln't read his expressions very well, but she assumed he was probably feeling a mixture of fear and regret.

"It's okay, Remus. Sirius isn't angry at you, he's just upset. He's worried about you, dear... there's no need to feel frightened." Remus looked for a moment like me might cry, which surprised them both, but he simply sniffed and then looked away sharply, letting her tend to the rest of his wounds before he went to have a talk with Dumbledore. Madam Pomfrey walked him outside to make sure nothing too concerning was going to happen when they met Sirius again. To their relief, he was leaning against the wall quietly waiting for them.

"Ready to go?" He asked calmly. Remus nodded and then whispered a thanks to Madam Pomfrey before heading off with Sirius. This was not a conversation he was looking forward to.


	4. Piece of Evidence 4

I sincerely apologize for not putting the piece of evidence for the last chapter up. It was "Somebody loves you if they call you out on your bullshit."

I would also like to thank each and every one of you that has added this story to their alerts, reviewed, and has added it to their favorites. :)

-Javien

* * *

><p>Chapter 4- "Somebody loves you if they don't mind the quiet."<p>

The atmosphere surrounding Remus and Sirius didn't improve during the long walk to Dumbledore's office. Remus didn't want to say anything in fear of Sirius still being angry and Sirius didn't want to say anything in fear of Remus being upset. Naturally, they both looked quite tense by the time Sirius knocked on the office door.

"Come in," came a slightly delayed voice. "We were just having a cup of tea while we waited for you." Sirius's brow furrowed and he pushed the door open to find James and Peter sitting in front of a bespectacled Professor Dumbledore. The man's hands were wrapped neatly, one atop the other and on that, his chin rested while he regarded them with a rather severe look. "Is there something you wish to tell me, Sirius?" He asked, unblinking. Remus paled next to him and tried hard not to shake as Sirius spoke.

"I've noticed certain irregularities in my friend's schedule, sir, and there's been cause for concern recently." James and Peter seemed to sink lower into their seats.

"Go on?" Dumbledore urged, sitting stiffly. Sirius looked at Remus before speaking. Remus didn't seem opposed to hearing what he had to say, so he went on.

"He's been tired all of the time and he's been sick a lot and even though he tells us it's about his family and he has to leave, I don't know if I can believe his Aunt is sick every month. What I'm trying to ask, I guess," Sirius sounded awkward as he spoke. He wasn't sure what he was trying to say. "...Is Remus in some kind of trouble?" If it were possible for James and Peter to sink any lower into their seats, they did. They were being strangely quiet, but it took Sirius until later to realize this. Dumbledore gave Remus a soft look and beckoned him closer. They spoke in hushed tones so that Sirius couldn't hear and it aggravated him, but he stood still and didn't complain. They seemed to come to some kind of agreement and then Remus walked back to him, even paler than before. He looked at Sirius for a moment and then pulled him into a quick hug, unsure if he would ever put up with it again. Sirius was very worried now, as he held Remus close and practically felt the fear radiating from his friend's body. The moment was gone almost before it had begun and Remus walked out of the Office, leaving James, Peter, and a very confused Sirius to talk alone with the headmaster.

"Sirius, it would be a good idea for you to sit down now and please, close the door. What I have to tell you now, these two already know," James and Peter made a mad dash for the door as Sirius was closing it, but Dumbledore held up a hand, "I would very much like the both of you to stay and support Mr. Black so that he does not have to bear the truth alone." Dumdledore eyed the two boys severely until they sat down again and slumped nervously into their chairs.

A good hour and a half later, Sirius, James, and Peter burst through the door of the Gryffindor dormitory and scared the living daylights out of Remus, who had been sitting on his bed reading. Before he could say anything, Sirius had hauled him off the bed and pulled him into a bone-crushing hug. It took a minute for Remus to register what exactly was happening to him, but when he saw the looks of sorrow and remorse on James and Peter's faces, it all sort of clicked in. Time passed, but no breach of the silence was attempted as they all stood there, each alone with his own thoughts. Eventually, it was Peter who tugged James off to leave Sirius and Remus alone. The two of them definitely had their own ideas on how to approach Remus, but seeing as Sirius had done it first, they didn't exactly have the time or opportunity at the moment. So they walked down the stairs and into the common room.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Sirius's voice was paper thin and small sounding, like a child's.

"I.. I thought... I didn't-..." Remus slowly brought his arms up around Sirius's neck in lack of a proper answer. They'd never done this sort of thing before, so it was new to both of them, but not completely unexpected. Sirius was a fairly physical person and Remus had never objected to a friend's show of affection before, so now shouldn't be any different. Sirius let him go after another minute and sat down on his bed. He looked up at Remus for a while before Remus decided to sit on the bed as well, at the other end of it.

"He said... that the transformations were dangerous." Sirius's voice was still paper thin and he didn't meet Remus's eyes. It took a quiet moment for Remus to respond.

"Yes... they're, well, they're difficult," he found himself saying. The strength in his voice was unexpected and something he hadn't known he'd had. Maybe it was some kind of reaction to Sirius's lack of strength? Sirius exhaled and ran a hand through his hair before speaking again.

"You thought we'd hate you, didn't you? You thought we wouldn't be friends with you anymore, or something." It wasn't exactly a question, so Remus didn't answer. He was just glad that he'd been wrong. "I feel like... if I touch you, you're going to break." He went on, not exactly changing the subject. Remus leaned forward then, resting his chin on his hands and his elbows on his knees and he stared at Sirius severely before speaking, looking almost exactly like Dumbledore had when they'd entered his office earlier.

"I resent that." Sirius paled as he spoke. "You've all been pushing me around since first year and I've been bullied by Slytherins since then as well. I'm not so fragile. I might find it hard to speak to you for a while if you treat me like glass. It will feel like a judgment to me and that in itself will lead to other problems. Don't try to tell yourself otherwise."

Sirius sat in silence, unaware of how grateful Remus felt for that very reaction. Sirius had revealed more of a caring side than Remus knew existed before that day and Sirius had definitely gotten to know Remus much more. Despite the confusion, hurt, and possible meltdown waiting to happen, they were both very glad for the comfortable silence that kept them away from such things. Remus smiled and wordlessly communicated that he was finished with the conversation and then pulled the same book he'd been reading earlier. It was a small novel with a frayed book cover the color of coffee. Sirius had assumed long ago that it was his favorite because he'd read it often when they were at Hogwarts. Finally, his curiosity got the better of him.

"What is that book you're always reading?" Remus smiled. Whether it was directed at him or the question itself, Sirius didn't quite know.

"To Kill A Mockingbird. My father began reading it to me shortly after... well." his smile hardened for a moment, but then became soft again as he looked back down at the book. Sirius looked thoughtfully at Remus then, wondering what could be so compelling after all the years he must have been reading it. Slowly and cautiously, Sirius crawled over to Remus's side of the bed and sat a little behind him so he could rest his arm on the boy's shoulder and his chin upon that. Remus was somewhere at the beginning of the book again, to Sirius's delight, which made reading over his shoulder that much easier. Later that night, about five chapters in, James and Peter came back up to the dormitory. They'd intended to have their talk with Remus, but when they saw Sirius and Remus reading together, they silently agreed they'd let it go for the night. Instead, Peter decided it was a good time to bother them.

"Remus, Sirius! You can't read without us!" The smallest boy scurried over to the bed and Remus laughed warmly at him and James sat cross-legged on the remaining space on the bed. It didn't take too long for him to realize he'd need to read it out loud, so they started over from the beginning.


	5. Piece of Evidence 5

I have no excuse that amplifies my feelings properly, so I'll have to make do with this:

I AM SO, SO, SO, SO SORRY THIS IS SO LATE.

so sorry.

HERE HAVE CUTENESS.

-Javien

* * *

><p>"Somebody loves you if they want you to be happy, even if that involves something that doesn't benefit them."<p>

"Sirius got a howler!"

"What? Why?"

"A howler..? What in Merli-"

"...Seriously, guys? I'm right here."

James, Peter, and Remus froze. Sirius had materialized behind the three at the most inopportune moment. James went a little red in the face, despite.

"I thought you were my _brother,_ James!"

Sirius' face morphed from annoyed into a sort of mock-disappointment. Lovely. Trust Sirius Black to turn an awkward moment into a joke.

"And _you,_ Moony! I'm hurt..."

Although James was happy enough to play along, Remus stiffly decided he wanted no part. The boy rolled his eyes and sighed in exasperation, turning his eyes back to his book.

"And... and..."

Uh oh. Here it comes.

"_YOU, _Peter!"

The boy in question squeaked fearfully and dove under Remus' bed to hide from the maniacal marauder. As an afterthought, this probably wasn't the best idea. Sirius had no problem throwing himself after Peter. The bed creaked and shook from the effort to remain upright and Remus hopped off, throwing James a warning look.

James' face went pallid and he took a good three steps backwards to avoid the chaos as Remus went to break things up.

* * *

><p>"Jesus, bloody- FUCK, Moony!"<p>

Remus laughed guiltily as the ice pack slipped and bonked Sirius on the nose.

"Beaten senseless by a crazed were- OKAY. OW. I'M SORRY... Hey! I'm in pain, here!"

Remus couldn't help himself as he broke out in fits of laughter. He hadn't meant to knock heads with Sirius, really. It just so happened that he'd misjudged his distance when he made a grab for the fallen ice pack. The scenario was just so ridiculous.

"...I can understand why you wanted us away from the bed while we fought, but go at us with the POTIONS book? This is your second offense today and~... oh sweet Merlin, please don't hurt me..."

Remus had remained silent for the entirety of the rant and it was beginning to make Sirius worry.

"Hey," he began.

Remus worried at his lower lip and looked aside.

"You okay, Moons?"

The boy sighed and finally gave up trying to somehow fasten the ice pack to Sirius' head. He bit his lip and looked cautiously up into a scrutinizing gaze.

"You might think it's a bit silly."

His voice came out quieter than he'd intended.

"Who, me? You kidding?"

Sirius grinned supportively. Remus began to nervously play with his hands in his lap.

"Are you... and James and Peter... angry at me?"

Sirius internally kicked himself for asking. Three days until the next full moon and the three of them were frantic about attempting the transformation with Remus.

"No, Remus. We aren't. We've got a surprise. You'll like it, though, I think. I promise."

Sirius smiled reassuringly, but Remus' eyes fell in disappointment.

"Do you want to know why I got a howler this morning?"

Remus' eyes brightened considerably. Sirius couldn't help but smile.

"Mom didn't want me hanging around you anymore. Said you were bad blood. Well... I told her where she could take her opinion... and thus, the howler."

The other boy's eyes widened marginally. Sirius smiled warmly on through the silence. It could have fallen into something comfortable, but-

"You know, I would never let anyone else beat the shit out of me."

He just couldn't help himself. Remus rolled his eyes and playfully slapped his friend's arm.

"Yeah. Well. Don't get used to it."

* * *

><p>From across the room, James had a strong hand clamped over Peter's mouth as they stared in stunned silence at the two on the bed. Remus and Sirius' knees were touching and it almost seemed as though neither was aware. almost. sirius' hand kept mindlessly ghosting over Remus' and james narrowed his eyes at the sight. sirius glanced at james. though the initial action was short-lived, the two said all that needed to be said.<p>

"I know what I'm doing."

"Don't fuck up.


	6. Interlude

Remus woke early that day and found he was well enough to attend classes. He was confused. Very, very confused.

There were other things to be confused about as well- such as how Sirius Black was also up early for breakfast and why he had bags of exhaustion under his eyes. They were hidden by his hair.

"Sirius?"

A pause. Sirius was bent over his breakfast, leaning lazily over the table.

"Hmm?"

Another pause.

"Why are you up so early?"

Truth be told, Remus didn't really want to know.

"Uh... 'bout that..." Sirius slurred as milk dribbled down his chin.

That was when James saved him.

"Moony! Good morning, Sirius."

James was grinning from ear to ear and although Remus' first instinct was to run, he stayed firmly planted in his seat and waited to hear what was about to be said.

"Before we, er, get on with this, I'd like to apologize for Peter. Poor bloke just can't hold his pumpkin juice. Now that we've cleared that bit up, how much has Padfoot told you?"

Sirius groaned and let his head drop into the cold bowl of cereal before him. Remus pursed his lips in confusion.

"...Padfoot?"

James' grin widened as Sirius groaned again, though the sound was muffled through ceramic.

"Sirius is Padfoot. He decided last night. I'll be Prongs-" Sirius rolled his eyes, though neither of his friends could see this, "-and Pete hasn't decided yet."

"But my... I have a nickname because..."

Remus furrowed his eyebrows and tried hard not to come to the conclusion that all three of his best friends were illegal animagi, but it was hard not to jump to conclusions with them.

"I think the lights just came on upstairs," James slapped Sirius hard on the back and he choked, finally emerging from his breakfast. "What say you, Padfoot?"

A pained silence.

"Well, that'll be all for now, I think. Ta, darlings. My work here is done!"

With that, James stood and marched gleefully out of the great hall.

"So... you're all..."

Remus, though delayed as he was, didn't have a chance to finish his thought.

"I WILL KILL HIM."

Remus jumped, spilling his pumpkin juice all over his trousers.

"AND THEN I WILL BRING HIM BACK. AND THEN KILL HIM AGAIN."


	7. Piece of Evidence 6

"Somebody loves you if they can order you food without having to ask what you want."

Remus was grateful for the sense of stability, even wellness, that hung in the air around him that year. No headaches, sore muscles, bandages... anything. For once, he was healthy.

Although this was a rare and blessed time for Remus, life seemed to continue to throw him curveballs.

The last three full moons had been the easiest in his life and he was eternally grateful for his friends. His idiotic, stupid, brave friends that made everything possible.

And yet...

Everywhere he turned, there was Sirius. In his classes, the common room, behind him, and even in his thoughts. Remus couldn't escape and worse, he found he didn't want to.

Love, obsession, curiosity, protectiveness... whatever it was that had suddenly caught the both of them and pulled mercilessly, Remus was happy with it.

"You okay, Moons?"

And here he was again, leaning over Remus in the History section of the library, one arm resting on the shelf beside him, trapping Remus between Sirius and the books. Remus grinned slightly at the thought. What would it be, Sirius or the books?

As much as he loved books...

"Remus?" Sirius asked, quieter, leaning forward to look closer; to try to catch the other's eye.

Remus opened his mouth to answer and found that he couldn't. This whole... think... monologue... innermost thought process... it was taking control of him. That in itself scared the hell out of him.

Sirius put a hand to Remus' face, his thumb gently rubbing the other boy's cheekbone.

"Moony...?" Concern flickered in Sirius' eyes and he leaned closer, trying to pull the boy out of himself.

"Sirius... I'm sorry... did you need something?"

They were too close. Remus should have expected what came next.

"Yes, actually."

The words were whispered, a tongue running over dry lips. The kiss was subtle and cautious, a taste. When he pulled away, Remus' eyes were closed and he was up in the clouds again.

Sirius decided he'd try again just for good measure. When his lips were met with a smile, he knew the spell was gone.

Remus slept through dinner that evening, wrapped warmly in Sirius' arms. When he woke again later, he found a blueberry muffin and hot chocolate sitting on his night stand.

"How did he know?" Remus wondered, biting into the still-warm muffin.


End file.
